I’ve been in a forced-still state going on 4 weeks.  Nothing serious.  Just the result of being a certain age and having a certain something removed.  My major adventures have been washing my hair and looking out windows a la Jimmy Stewart.  I don’t do Still well.

I am a type A control freak with vacillating ADHD.  I exercise every morning as if training for active duty or at the very least a marathon –  I’ve done 15.

I come from a long line of DO-ers.  I  recall sitting on the edge of my mom’s bed, eating a frosted pop tart (ironic), while she did her calisthenics.  “Barclay, you have to get out of breath once a day,” she’d say.  Peggy was ahead of her time — though never without pearls and pumps (I dare you to try jumping jacks in heels.)  She didn’t have Jane Fonda to guide her – only a well-worn copy of the Royal Canadian Exercise Plans for Physical Fitness whose target audience was clearly male.

My dad, Champe, jogged and tennis-ed his way into his mid-90s, fighting the inevitable shrinking of life with religious zeal. When walking became problematic, he shuffled the driveway with a bike helmet and a walker.  He took up tennis in his 50s and in his 80s was still working on his topspin.

So how have I been coping?  First, I am grateful.  My friend Mary is in the battle of her life with cancer nodules lingering in her lungs.  Any of us can wake up to discover a lump, a something, that wasn’t there the day before.  (And you thought this blog would be uplifting.)

So yes, I am thankful.

And oh so productive.

Thanks to YouTube, I learned how to make beach-y waves in my hair.   And I finally subscribed to the digital NY Times where amid news and op-eds, I discovered that  face exercises  can make you look 3 years younger. There’s scientific proof.  Game changer.  So I’ve been quite busy making fish faces and craning my neck to “kiss” the ceiling.  3 years is 3 years.

But I’ve also taken to praying out loud.  Talking with God about pretty much everything.  It may sound disrespectful or trite —  but I’m enjoying hanging out with God.  I’ve been using this ReadScripture app with hand-drawn videos that make the complex understandable.

So Amazon is probably wondering why they haven’t heard from me today, being that it’s 9AM.   And Facebook  —  with its too cute babies, and women with easy beach-y hair, and Suzanne Somers luring me to her ageless beauty systems — needs to be reeled in.  (QVC has to be shunned —  that could be the downfall of our bank account.)

But being still and working on ones inner life isn’t so bad.  Or scary.  Granted, I know it’s not forever and I’m not in egregious pain.  I’ve just been given a taste, a preview.

I’ve been able to sit in God’s presence, His shelter, and know that He is God.  Psalm 46:10.  He really is.

Working on topspin can’t compete.


3 thoughts on “Still

Add yours

  1. This one is special and deserves its own place. It’s a wonderful reflection. Everything happens for a reason in life and I believe this is yours. Reflections and your belief in God is who you are dear Barclay and you have woven that in beautifully into your writing.

    Sent from my iPhone



  2. This is even more beautiful than you are (no offense). Your sense of humor regarding the every day things that we do in our lives – then thoroughly intertwined with your faith – is extraordinary. Thank you so much for sharing.


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